Bright stars in a night sky arranged in the shape of a heart, romantic magic night, love  and Valentines day card

Emotional pain strikes at the heart of our being and can leave us feeling vulnerable in the weakest areas. Whether it’s pain gathered from youth or a romantic relationship dissolving, there is a propensity to shut down later.

Broken Heart

People refer to the deep hurt that absorbs them in the aftermath of a stressful encounter. When they are asked where it hurts, they point to their torso. This is because the heart gives and receives love. So once you experience disappointment or despair, it’s normal to feel that your heart is breaking.

The expression heartbroken describes the heart being pulled apart through despair or sadness. The good and bad news is that none of us are resistant to it unless you have been living under a rock, which I hope isn’t true.

Nevertheless, you can’t continue to feelings of despair and disappointment because doing so means to inhibit life flowing through you. It’s comparable to building a dam out of heaps of stones in a flowing river. Eventually, the power of the water will erode the rocks or find its way through it.

Awakening Transformation

Here is a Secret to reach the Freedom of being Yourself: “What’s happened in the past can not be changed. We can not unring the bell, but we could move forward… and the way you decide to move forward from this moment, is your choice that will determine the fabric of your life.”

Whilst pain can ruin your self-esteem, it will naturally recede and open your heart . Love must flow through you since your core character is vested in love.

Despite the hatred and evil in the world, love is the most effective energy. Its healing ability shows it is a potent force in our own lives.

No doubt if you are reading this, you’ve been hurt before. You may be still carrying the pain and refusing to let go because who would you be without the pain?

It’s hard to release pain after a traumatic experience. There’s a feeling of numbness, and emptiness in areas that you never knew existed. It’s natural to protect yourself by vowing to not be hurt again.

But as you know, the wall you build to protect you is the exact same wall that prevents love finding its way into your life. Remember my earlier metaphor of the dam constructed of rocks. Ultimately the wall will have to come down in the event that you would like to discover the freedom to be yourself .

Vulnerability is a fundamental part of being human, and vulnerabilities are the doors back into peace, joy, and love. Here some guidelines:

Heal Your Wounds

By drawing on mindfulness and self-compassion, your emotional wounds could be changed.

I would like you to know it’s normal to protect yourself. It’s natural to experience hurt once the pain is too much to bear. It’s normal to cry yourself to sleep because nothing else makes sense, other than to identify to your emotional wounds.

I know what it is like because I’ve experienced deep emotional pain during my life. However I guarantee you, in the months and years that followed, it was the most crucial point in my life.

I discovered the psychological pain settles and what’s left is a most beautiful and expansive energy of love which has ever been there. It is important to recognize that you turn your pain into suffering when you resist it.

I liken it to moon gazing at which the clouds occasionally obscure the moon. Yet, once the clouds pass, a full moon reveals itself hidden temporarily beneath the cover of clouds.

The exact same is true of your own pain. You may continue to the pain or select forgiveness and self-compassion, so love flows through you. The pain associated with heartbreak is that the heart’s shell breaking open so love can flow freely.

The more open your heart is, the more you have access to a normal state of peace, well-being, and simplicity, regardless of what’s happening. You’re the embodiment of love. Pain and disappointment are transitory states if you don’t attach yourself to them.

Renew The Love In Your Heart

How can you let go of this pain?

First, forgive yourself and others who contributed to your pain. If you require professional advice, seek out a trained counsellor or therapist who will direct your recovery.

Forgiveness is the entrance fee you pay for the freedom to be yourself . If the wall you assembled is the shield of protection, then forgiveness is the door through it. It shows you how you can find inner peace, knowing you can defy the torrents of life. Forgiveness is the key to a better life and the freedom to go through the gentleness of love inside your heart.

Second, lean into your own pain and experience it in your own pace. Naturally, what you stow away builds energy, so the psychological wounds will have you. I’ve spent the past decade training clients who experienced physical symptoms as a result of deferring their psychological pain.

In cooperation with trained therapists, I assisted the person to heal their psychological and physical pain so that they could discover independence within themselves.

Make Peace

Finally, make peace with the part of you that feels anger, fear, sadness or despair. Accept these emotions rather than pushing them down. Give up guilt as it keeps you trapped and does little to transform your pain.

I don’t need to justify why bad things happen because I do not have the answers and when I did, I’d caution you to run fast. However, what I can say is that I’ve experienced pain and suffering in the deepest level and understand there is a reason why I brought it. You will discover your reason or you might not.

In any event, I urge you to not focus on WHY an experience happens, but how it is possible to transform and heal the pain. Pay attention to HOW can you heal yourself and regain your liberty by renewing the love in your heart.